Hello gorgeous Nature lovers! Today I want to try something different. I have an exercise for you.
Create an image in your mind of a beautiful, natural landscape. Notice the time of day, the weather, the quality of the light. Is there a breeze? What can you see? Are there trees nearby or in the distance, plants, flowers, grass, bushes? What colours and hues can you see in the landscape? Perhaps you are near the sea, or standing on a mountain, or by a lake. Notice what you can hear – birds, wind in the trees, the buzzing of insects, or silence. Can you taste anything, and can you reach out and touch anything? If so what does it feel like? What can you smell?
Take in the peace and harmony of your surroundings using all your senses. And then notice how you feel.
Now, imagine you have a canvas in front of you, and a selection of paints or pastels or charcoals – anything you would like to create an image with. You paint your experience onto the canvas as an image that captures how you feel as best you can. Use any colours you like. Any textures you want. It can be a collage if you like. It doesn’t have to look exactly like what you see in front of you. What is important is that you express yourself fully to create in your mind the exact piece of art you want.
Now in your mind’s eye, step back and look at your artwork. Admire it and be proud of it. It represents your full expression in all its beauty, without censorship.
Now imagine a filter has been placed over it. The colours gradually fade to black and white. Imagine the image becomes blurred and you can’t make out the detail that you so carefully and painstakingly created. What you’re left with is not quite what you intended. It’s not a true representation of what you had in mind before you created it. If that filter were to stay in place, you might feel disappointed, sad, angry even. Frustrated that you have not been able to represent exactly how you feel.
This is exactly what happens to you and your partner when you don’t communicate effectively. If you think of communication as an art, you can picture yourself and your partner as the artists. The communication itself is the medium for expression, and the finished canvas is the message or expression.
You both have the capacity to create something beautiful together. But sometimes, for some reason you can’t figure out, something stops you from being able to create and send the message you wanted. And sometimes something stops your partner from receiving it. Sometimes it doesn’t look or feel beautiful and it’s not possible for you to admire it. Why?
- Perhaps you don’t have the exact tools or materials you need to express yourself with.
- Perhaps you have the tools but don’t know how to use them.
- Perhaps something is stopping you and your partner from seeing or appreciating the message, and you see a distorted version of the artwork, or mis-interpret its meaning.
- Perhaps there is something amiss on the environment that the message is created or displayed in.
What if you had the tools you needed to enable you to express yourself fully to create your message, and had guidance on how to use them? What if you understood what was stopping both you and your partner from seeing and appreciating the message and were able to dis-spell any misinterpretations of that message? What if you both could see the message – your artwork – in all its colour, vibrancy and beauty?
Effective commubnication doesn’t come easily to all of us. Neither does creativity. Not all of us consider ourselves artists. But as part of Nature, we are all artists. We are all born out of creativity. And we are blessed with an imagination and means to express ourselves. Sometimes we lack the confidence, tools or skills to be able to express in teh way that we want or need.
Just as some people take art classes to harness their creativity and learn the requisite skills, some couples seek Relationship Coaching to learn about self expression with each other. This can involve effective communication skills. As a Relationship Coach, when you work with me I give you the exact tool and skills you need to be able to:-
- Understand your own and your partner’s triggers – the things that upset you – and why they trigger you.
- Create and deliver your message so that your partner can experience it more-so in the way that you intended it, so that you feel heard and acknowledged.
- Form a deeper connection with your partner as a result, enabling you to resolve conflict in a healthy and compassionate way.
If you would like to know more about how I can help you, please contact me via private message on Facebook, through my Facebook page, or by commenting below – I would love to hear from you!
P.S. If you would like my help and guidance to communicate in your relationship in a positive way, click here to download my FREE Communication Guide for Couples. This guide has further tips for effective communication that you can use with your partner RIGHT NOW to enhance your relationship.
P.P.S. Coming soon – If you would personally like my expert support to learn the EXACT techniques and steps to resolve conflict effectively without hurt, anger and frustration, you will soon be able to sign up for my Compassionate Conflict for Couples E-Course. It is going to be incredible value, and the first 10 people who sign up will receive a bonus 1:1 coaching call with me, absolutely FREE! These places will go fast and are strictly on a first-come, first-served basis.
If you would like any further information about this course or want to be notified as soon as it is released, or have anything else that you would like help with, I would be delighted to hear from you. Just PM me on Facebook or sign up for my Newsletter to be notified about this and other exciting news straight away.
I can’t wait to hear from you!