Yesterday, I came across a meadow. Expansive, it stretched out before me, inviting me in with it’s delicate flowers, buzzing insects and long, rustling grass. As I admired the view, I felt drawn to it – to step in and walk among the grass, and sit and touch the beautiful flowers.
And yet there was another feeling within me that I hadn’t expected. The lack of enclosed space, or trees to shelter under, felt exposing. My urge to immerse myself in the beautiful meadow was at odds with feeling somehow alone and unprotected.
And then it struck me.
This is what it means to be vulnerable.
I thought about how this can be true of our relationships. We can consciously want a deeper and more meaningful relationship, drawn to the beauty of expressing our authentic self and our deepest feelings with our partner. And we can simultaneously fear our partner’s response, or that it exposes us and makes us vulnerable to hurt and rejection.
The route towards the beauty we crave is trust. This trust creates inner security, so that in times of vulnerability, we trust our partner to protect, take care of, and honour our feelings.
Trust builds over time, with practice. It’s something that we move towards, slowly at times. We just have to start with the first step.
So I stepped out into the meadow, and walked right out in to the centre. From there I turned round, arms outstretched, and admired the 360 degree view all around me. The rolling hills, the distant trees. The feeling of space.
Trusting in my own ability to know that I was safe, despite my fears and inhibitions.
I gained so much more from the experience, because I dared to allow myself to.
Stepping towards your partner in this way can feel daunting. It can feel as though you don’t know where to start, or how to find the words to express your feelings. And sometimes you can lack confidence in how you deliver your message. If this is something you struggle with, I would love to guide you. My FREE Communication Guide for Couples, giving you the key principles of effective communication, is the perfect place to start. Click on the link below to download your free copy today.
And just remember, your relationship is like taking a lifelong journey together into the wilderness. Sometimes you just need a bit of guidance.