It’s HOT today. For English weather, having a spell of hot days like this is a rare thing!
Most of us adore the sun and the warmth – I know I do! I love the summer, the long days, the warmth (I am naturally ALWAYS cold), the fact that it is so much easier to spend time outdoors in Nature. The sunshine can be inspiring and motivating.
Who remembers the childhood song “The sun has got his hat on, hip hip hip hooray! The sun has got his hat on and he’s coming out to play”? My grandfather taught me that.
But on stifling days/evenings like this, it can sometimes be a bit too much of a good thing. We can feel too hot, lethargic, restless, and have a general sense that we just can’t be motivated to do anything. I also remember my grandfather, on one particularly hot day after he had had his first stroke, looking up and saying “That bloody sun. If I had a shotgun, I’d shoot it out of the sky!”. That memory always makes me smile.
Sometimes relationships can be fun and inspiring, motivating and joyful. But they also take commitment, attention and care and maintenance.
And sometimes, you might just not feel like it.
Not because you don’t care about each other. Not because you don’t think that making time for each other is important. But because you might associate making time for your relationship with hard work. Another task that has to be done.
For the couples I coach, this is often something that comes up. They will say they don’t have time to spend on the relationship as they are so busy and over-committed elsewhere. But when challenged they will often admit to avoiding having difficult discussions because they are concerned about facing difficult feelings.
It doesn’t have to be that way at all.
Of course I can give you lots of tools and resources to feel more confident in your communication, and deepen your connection through compassionate conflict resolution. But not every conversation has to be serious, or have a goal in mind.
You can just make time to do something fun together, and focus on the positives in your relationship. Time together should be enjoyable too! It still counts as making time for your relationship!
So try this exercise – to focus on the positives in your relationship – with your partner this evening. Take it in turns and don’t interrupt each other:-
- Tell your partner the first thing that attracted you to them when you first met.
- Tell your partner one thing that you like/appreciate about them the most.
- Tell your partner one thing you are looking forward to doing together in the future.
Then swap roles and ask your partner to do the same.
That’s all you have to do. Easy! Notice how positive you feel afterwards!
If you would like to share your experiences in the comments below I would love to hear them!
Have fun, and remember, always maintain and tend to your relationship to feel it thrive!
Your Nature-Inspired Relationship Coach,
P.S. I am soon to launch a brand new course designed to help you and your partner focus on all the positives in your relationship, and deepen your bond through pure enjoyment! Do you want to have a relationship full of fun and positivity, rather than always focusing on negativity? If so then let me know if you are interested! CLICK HERE to email me. I will make sure you are the first to know when it goes live and you will be eligible for an extra special bonus just for enquiring! And for lots of expert relationship tips and advice straight to your inbox, CLICK HERE to sign up to my Newsletter.