On the 9th day of Christmas…….what will you give your true love?

If I could suggest one thing that you could give your partner for Christmas this year, it wouldn’t be something that money could buy. It would be something that you can create, using this simple recipe……..

The number one thing you can give your partner that would make a huge difference to your relationship, is based on these ingredients:-

  • Understanding
  • Curiosity
  • Listening


As human beings, we’re constantly, desperately, reaching out to be understood. But if you want your partner to understand you, you must firstly try to understand them. Seek to understand, and only then, seek to be understood.

It’s not always easy to understand your partner, particularly when you’re coming from a completely different perspective. But rather than becoming frustrated, try harder to meet them where they are. Want to know the key to understanding? It’s this:-


This is the motivation you need to move towards your ultimate gift. Ask questions, rather than making assumptions. Ask your partner to re-phrase what they said if that helps, or to say how they feel using fewer words.  But if you want to satisfy that curiosity, you need this essential skill:-


Really pay attention to what they are saying. Repeat it back to them if necessary to check you have heard them correctly.

Mix all of these components together in sequential order. The result of all this?

The number one gift – Empathy.

With all of this new knowledge of your partner, you’re far more likely to be able to put yourself in their shoes. You will find that conflict is de-escalated or even dissolved entirely. Your partner will be appreciative towards you and far more likely to afford you the same respect and time in empathising with your position and feelings.

If you’d like my help and guidance in creating a joyful and harmonious relationship, click below to contact me for an informal discussion about how we can make that happen!

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Deepening your connection with Nature 🙂

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